The Elephant in the Room

Here I am referring to my gorgeous; 2 almost 3 year old daughter, as an elephant!  

 You decide – I don't really think she looks like an elephant!  

Bubsieboo is the light of the family’s life.  

 We are all in adoration of this cute bundle of joy that has entered our world.  

 Every day is a new delight to be experienced by us all, young and old – with Bubsieboo in our home.

The sibling gap between our children is a bit unique.  The dancer was 12 when Bubsieboo was born, the swimmer 10, and the cricketer 7.  It is unusual to have a gap of 12 years oldest to youngest and then 7 years between 2^nd youngest and youngest.

We considered all of those elements when we were still hoping to have our fourth child.  Also unusually, we always wanted 4 children (I think I may have wanted it as a little girl!  And luckily Mr M agreed with the dream) Very few people are lucky enough to say the number of children they would like to have in their family and achieve that dream.

Things were going along swimmingly with the first 3 children.  Each time we hoped to have a child, we were lucky enough to conceive.  By the time we had 3 beautiful children we were run off our feet.  3 children under 5 is a heavy schedule.  We were quickly thrown into our oldest starting school and all of the busyness that comes with that new change in circumstance.  Amid health concerns for Mr M and a crazy life, we were still very keen to have our fourth child.  Nature did not agree.  Apart from some very early term miscarriages, the fourth child did not look like a reality.

With 3 fantastic children, you can never lament not having the desired ‘number’ of children.  We had a fantastic family, we were very content manoeuvring through life’s highs and lows and there was never any disappointment that the fourth child was not being born.

It was always there.  There was always a ‘what if’.  So with a sensible head on my shoulders, it was decided that if I did not conceive prior to 40 then that door was closed.

So it was with great excitement that Bubsieboo arrived 6 weeks before my 40^th Birthday!!

I had not thought through the 4 children thing properly.  If I actually had Bubsieboo when I first had hoped- life would have been manic, and you may have discovered me rocking in the corner – at the very least, I would never have started my own business.   

Having the gap between children in our family has been fantastic.  All of our children have benefited greatly from the arrival of Bubsieboo.   

We have all learnt so much from her and she in turn has had a wonderful past 2 years with many mothers, fun siblings and a great ‘all round’ family environment.

In saying this, she is always the ELEPHANT.  

I love watching people work out that the girls towering over their mother are actually older sisters to the confident Bubsieboo.  When people are shocked they really do show all emotion on their faces – no poker faces here.  It takes a couple of minutes to process and then people usually look at me enquiringly.  They want to know.  

• Was it a mistake?
• Could I have really thought this through?
• Why would you go back?
• It must be a new partner?

In all sincerity I answer the ELEPHANT questions.

Bubsieboo was a much wanted and loved choice to have another person in our family.   are thrilled that we have our 4 beautiful blessings in our life.

Bubsieboo is a much loved, planned for and desired addition to our family.  We feel lucky everyday to have our own little 'elephant in the room'

For the Love of Learning

Donna

10 TIPS Survival Guide to the Kitchen Reno

I don’t know if you have ever considered a kitchen reno before???   

Have you heard the horror stories? 
Have you heard about the challenges? 

I had……I didn’t believe them……..  I was wrong.

We had quite a good kitchen.  15 years ago it was a very good quality kitchen.  It was Tassie oak with a hideous green lino benchtop.  It would have been installed by a proper kitchen company at the time.  It is just that a lot has changed in kitchen design in those 15 years.

We quickly painted the Tassie oak a whiteish colour to break up the kitchen/floorboards which allowed the kitchen to actually be a bright space (except for that dreaded green benchtop)

Along with lots of décor imperfections when we moved into the house, the kitchen was on the list to do.  It was always moved to the bottom of the pile.

As a family we have always valued overseas travel ahead of latest home interior design and the arrival of the 4^th child into the mix slowed down the decorating.  So it was with elation that Mr M and I studied the finances at the end of last year and realised that we could afford the new kitchen.

With much planning, quotes, design, signing contracts the kitchen became a fulltime job for me for some weeks.  The first plans included the removal of less than a metre of wall.  This again required builders and then engineers as this small section of wall was found to be a supporting wall….. you know where I am going with this….. so, then we had to take down the small section of wall and the living area was turned into a building site of several tradesmen and plaster dust thick on every surface.  At that point, the final kitchen measurements could be made and then we had to wait in the building zone for 5 weeks until the kitchen demolition could start.

I was prepared.  I had pre-cooked meals, I had my mother-in-law on hand who was kindly preparing fresh meals.  We were told it was a 3 week process.  We made a make shift kitchen in the laundry (when I say we, I mean myself, the children and my very generous sister and brother in law who offered to help pack up the kitchen – as mr. M was busy on an overseas business trip –timed to perfection!)

• I dealt with all the steady stream of tradespeople that wandered through my home for the three weeks.
• I dealt with the preparation of school lunches at the world’s tiniest kitchen bench,
• I dealt with the 2 year old that had to be kept amused away from the hub of the home where we always are….did I mention that it was the wettest week in the history of Sydney in the last 40something years, well yes that was happening too so access to the backyard was beyond limited. 

What I DIDN'T deal with (and believe me I am using ‘didn’t deal’ as a euphemism for –left me in a screaming near-psychotic mess!) was how to assemble meals for 5/6 people each evening, when you walk in no earlier than 7pm each evening after the ridiculous family schedule of extra curricular activities.  

 I stood in front of the microwave for at least an hour each evening trying to heat or defrost meals one plate at a time.  

 I tried to dish up meals out of the slow cooker one plate at a time – with nowhere to place the plated food.   

We ate seated on the ground, clearing a space in the boxes of kitchen goods and kitchen building appliances. 

I tried to refrain from ringing take away every night of the week, for 3 weeks. 

I stood at my laundry sink to handwash every utensil we used and then get someone (often me as everyone else had to head to bed hours previously) to dry it instantly as there was NO WHERE to place the clean item.  

This may have been the hardest task I have had to face as a mother of 4 children!?

As a renovation community service I have compiled:

10 TOP TIPS- Kitchen Reno Survival Guide:

1. Remove family from the residence while kitchen is being replaced!!  Obviously this will rarely be the case
2. Be gentle with yourself – take away / eating out meals for a couple of weeks will not KILL the children
3. Start with the end in sight – maintain that vision
4. Talk talk talk to the tradespeople – don’t forget to be well supplied with tea/coffee/sweet things
5. Don’t just believe you are changing a kitchen – consider the lighting, flooring, paint and decoration – it will ALL change
6. Unpack the kitchen and sort it as you go – charity and throw out was sorted out as I unpacked
7. Be organised – everything has a place; in the temporary kitchen as well as the NEW kitchen
8. Don’t be afraid to find a new style.  We have been married for 17 years, so we still have a lot of things from the past decade.  Keep the good, but don’t hang onto the old – a lot has changed in design since you first started purchasing kitchen goods
9. Don’t try to work at another job.  This task was honestly a time consuming full time job.  I found myself running for the shops on a daily basis – new light fightings, new tiles for the backsplash, investigating fittings, looking at display homes etc etc.
10. This is not something that happens very often.  Enjoy the fun and luxury of being able to renovate your house and make a true mark on your home – it is all you, that doesn’t happen everyday.

•   I recognise that my hardship was a ‘first world’ problem.  
• 

• I recognise that I am very lucky to have the opportunity to spend 3 weeks in a bit of difficulty to have a future with a beautiful new kitchen.  
  
•  
• I recognise that I am now IN LOVE with my new kitchen and am thankful for it every single day.  
•  
  

I write this as a warning to anyone considering the kitchen reno.  DO NOT underestimate the challenge that will be ahead of you.  When people say, “it makes life unpleasant” – don’t take it lightly.  The kitchen really is the centre of the home, it is the most important room for the family. When that is taken away from you, even for just a couple of weeks – the mother of the home may turn into a CRAZED woman whenever anyone mentions food.  

We’ll put it down to a learning opportunity

For the Love of Learning

Donna

 

PS -needless to say, when the floorboards had to be repaired and sanded following
the kitchen reno – it was booked at a suitable time when the family was away on holiday